Sex and Intimacy

Here I am thinking, and ranting again about things that I have not learned from first hand experience... and I know that talking about something will never fix a problem, but perhaps by verbalizing things, I'll be able to gain more of a proper perspective with which to walk into life's challenges. ...don't worry if that didn't make any sense, I'm still trying to figure it out. ;o)

I heard this Christian speaker a while ago, talking about what people called the 'Sexual Revolution'. He was saying that in actual fact, the sexual revolution was really a cultural search for intimacy. Which is an interesting idea... and it got me thinking about how twisted the current view of sex is. People search for intimacy in sex... and what they end up with is pain and loneliness. Sex is splashed all over the faces of our media though. It's given the spotlight, and we start to forget that there is more to man/woman relationships. We forget that sex is merely the icing on the cake of intimacy for which marriage was established. The bible parallels marriage with Christ's relationship with His church... Which, I daresay, is NOT sexual in any way. I think, ultimately, and despite ourselves, Christians have largely stopped looking at marriage in the context of a threesome. I'd even say that us Christians have tacked for an easier course, and looked to the false winds of sexual gratification to fill the sails of marriage. In plain language... we've let ourselves get caught up in the world's view of marriage, to the point where we start to see marriage as a way to have sex without sinning. But think about it... a plate full of sweet icing, with no cake, gets really sickening after a short time. The sugar, without the filling substance of the cake ultimately leaves us unsatisfied and feeling sickly. So it is with sex that is used to replace intimacy. If we lose the essence of marriage, which I believe is intimacy, then we will lose one of the greatest glimpses of the kind of intimate fulfillment that will be found in heaven, with God. But on the course we've set now, we're headed straight for the extinction of marriage.
I think if we really dug into what the bible says about marriage, intimacy and sex, we'd find that God looks at the whole thing from a much different angle. What if we could change our view of sex and intimacy so far around that we could see that both start with a personal relationship with God? If we put sex in it's proper place, it suddenly leaves a empty spotlight that we need to fill with something else... which might be why we're not so interested in doing that. But if we try and put intimacy back into the essence of marriage, then we'd be much closer to finding the beauty of marriage. Even managing to put intimacy back into the focus of marriage still isn't enough though, because intimacy based only on our human abilities will fall apart, and is not actually true intimacy. True intimacy can only be found in our relationship with God, non? And if that's true... then before we could ever have intimacy in marriage, with another human, we would need to have established an intimate and real relationship with God. And this is where it gets immediately relevant to people my age... and, really, people of any age. I don't know anyone who doesn't have a longing for intimacy. But I wonder how many people, other then myself, sometimes believe that marriage or sex is the answer to that longing? How could someone who lives in this world, in this culture, possibly maintain a proper view of intimacy? Well, I suppose the answer to that is the same as above, 'become intimate God'. For myself though... that's pretty darn tough sometimes. I struggle with finding the motivation to continually seek after God, and intimacy with Him. It takes a lot of effort sometimes, and I don't always feel like putting in that effort. But that's what it all comes down to... and I think that if we really began to become intimate with God, sharing our deepest desires, emotions and dreams, (and by the way, 'sharing' means just that... we need to be aware that God has dreams, emotions and desires as well. Intimacy isn't a one-way street... if we're to become intimate with God; we need to listen to Him. We need to read His very intimate love letter to us, and learn about what is on God's heart.) we'd discover something so amazing and fulfilling that we would have no trouble being motivated to keep seeking a deeper relationship!
When God brings marriage into my life, I will be so much better able to devote myself to becoming intimate with my wife if I already have experienced true intimacy with God first. All the time and energy I put into my relationship with God now, will benefit my marriage relationship because the intimacy will already be established... all I'll need to do is let my wife in on it! Imagine how much better equipped I'll be to maintain an intimate relationship with the girl of my dreams, if I could learn first hand from God! And if both of us are getting more and more intimate with God... we'll only draw closer to each other. And when that is happening, our sex will be simply inexplicably amazing!! Think about it! The intimacy will already be there... the physical part of sex will not be our tool of intimacy. It will be an amazing reinforcement of that intimacy, and the whole marriage will benefit. And to be honest... I'm really looking forward to experiencing that kind of intimacy!

Intimacy starts now. I can see how God has put me in a position to seek Him with all of my being, I'm gonna do that. At least, I'm going to strive for that.

...I had more I wanted to say, but I'm tired now and I'm drawing a blank.
Thanks for reading...

God bless!